Monday, January 17, 2011

Very interesting....

As someone who loves the internet and blogs, I found this to be a fascinating discussion....hey it is a holiday, so I wasted time this morning reading the comments.

7 comments:

lulu said...

Wow that article made me laugh because it is so true. Especially since I stalk mormon-mommy blogs all the time and am a huge fan of the rockstar diaries mentioned in the article. I always hope my life will be as cute and blissful as Naomi's (from the Rockstar Diaries) when I become a wife/mom. Sometimes I feel like my obsession might be as bad as watching chick flicks. Like how you see these perfect love stories and wonder why it never really happens like that then it makes you all depressed because just NO guy seems to ever be like the ones in those romance movies.

But then again... my blog makes my life look more blissful that it is at times. I do have a private blog just for myself where I put the other not-so-lovely posts because who would want to read that anyway? So maybe i'm okay with that. And to be honest.. being a housewife/mother is what i've always looked foward to. Along with sewing clothes for my kids, baking for their birthday parties, etc. I would love to do just that. So as funny as it is to realize how weird/fascinating us Mormon girls are to the rest of the world. I guess i'm okay with that. haha

Thanks for posting that, definitely made me think!

Cheryl said...

Okay, so I read the article and a significant number of the comments. I've given myself a day to think about it in hopes of being able to say something that makes sense in this comment.

My first thought is that is makes me a little sad everything has to be so analyzed (I recognize the irony as I've pondered for a day and am now commenting) so heavily. I wonder why we can't just sit back and enjoy and celebrate each other's lives.

I'm not a follower of the uber-popular blogs out there. I don't have anything against them, it's just that my busy life allows time to keep up with my sisters, nieces, and friends. It doesn't have room to regularly keep up with people I don't even know. That's just me.

The blogs that I read have become an awesome way for me to keep up when it's hard otherwise. I learn things about my family that I wouldn't know otherwise. When you make a quick phone call to coordinate a family event, you often don't think to share a great thought you had or a story about your kids. Blogs allow us to share those things.

I have friends who have moved, and reading their blogs allows me to still participate in their lives. I love that. Sometimes, it's just fun to see other people doing their best to go through life each day just like I am.

In the case of family and friends, I like it when their blogs show happy times. That means my loved ones are happy. Sometimes their blogs report heart-wrenching experiences or deep thoughts. I'm grateful for those posts too 'cause it means I can be engaged in their world and their experiences.

Cheryl said...

[Cheryl continues....]

So, with that in mind, I return to the question of why can't we just let people do their thing and be happy for them? A large number of the comments made reference to a certain conspiracy in which the LDS church was actually responsible for these women's blogs. Really?? Must everything degenerate to accusations of conspiracy and fraud? Or is it possible that we as women could just be happy for another woman who seems okay with her life? Maybe some of these women bloggers are doing exactly what we are doing within our family, and they are really writing about their lives. Is that possible too?

There were accusations of many of the blogs being done with professional photographers and clothing the women get for free to do promotions. Maybe there is some of that because that's how things have evolved for a particular woman. It's not my life, but maybe it's hers. However, I will say that Jessica and Katelyn take near perfect pictures - they are not professionals. Jessica is the picture of fashion in her blog pictures, but she's the best bargain hunter I know. Heather has posted recipes or experiences with recipes that have resulted in fun new meals at my house. Romney's Christmas crafts were dang cute. It's possible to look professional simply because you are good at something. Maybe instead of using that as an opportunity to criticize and accuse, we should use it as a chance to recognize that every day, normal people have extraordinary talents --- the "professionals" don't have a corner on those markets. In each of my examples above, I'm citing something those women do on occasion. When they are not taking pictures, cooking, crafting, etc. they are changing diapers, working, doing homework, reading, etc.

Sometimes I feel like I am a bit of an "every woman" (I say a bit 'cause I don't believe there is really an "every woman") in that I've worked full time, I've stayed home full time, I've worked part time while staying home, I've been infertile, I've had kids, I gave birth, I adopted, I've been happy, I've been depressed, I've lived in a predominantly LDS community, I've lived in a predominantly non-LDS community, etc., etc., etc. My experience is that people are people. We are all vastly different and vastly similar in the very same breath. Anything that was said in those comments could be said of another group of people in a different time and space. There are women happy at home. There are women happy at work. There are women who are sad and unfulfilled at work and those who are the same at home. I just choose to wish the best for everyone, and I joy in seeing someone find a passion and relish it.

I'm mostly rambling here, but I will finish by saying that I enjoyed the original blogger's thoughts. Most of you know that one of my stated life goals is that I'd love to meet everyone. I obviously can't do that, but I read a lot to "meet" those I can't "meet" in person. Now I know something about how that blog author thinks. She, in turn, has enjoyed "meeting" the women whose blogs she reads. Good for her. I'm less satisfied with the vindictive, mean-spirited comments that followed. I like healthy discussion and debate, but I don't like mean-spiritedness, accusations, and hatred. It makes me sad that one party accuses and in an effort to defend, the other parties are equally vitriolic.

I'm glad there are differences in people and interests and talents and abilities. I hope I can keep reading blogs and "meeting" people in person or otherwise so I can celebrate those differences and enjoy our similarities at the same time.

Cheryl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ColleenDown said...

So thanks for sharing your thoughts--this has been an interesting discussion both on the phone and in person. I still love blogging and hope no one is tempted to do anything different out there. Cheryl and I talked about how every generation-including our grandma's has had someone else to compare themselves too. When I was first married it was Marabel Morgan, the Total Woman-not only did you have to be a domestic goddess during the day but a sex goddess at night-the seventies were rough. In the eighties we all had to wonder what "Martha Stewart" would do--thank goodness her marriage fell apart so that relieved a little pressure. Today's young moms compare themselves to blogger moms--it is just what we do. Peruse a few archived magazines from the 50's and count your blessings. I second what Cheryl said, we love to see what everyone is doing, thinking, creating, sharing--please don't stop. I think the point of this article is there is something about "domesticity" that attracts us all-young, old, single, married...Blogs are just one way of celebrating. So click on Jessica's blog with the Kelly Hampton Video and remember "It is what makes us unique that makes us beautiful--celebrate the difference!"

ColleenDown said...

O.K. thank goodness Isaac has given me the words to describe the KSL story on this article. "What the hell..."Now the conversation is venturing into the ridiculous!

Heather said...

I had no idea there were so many closet mommy blog followers out there. I have no illusion that all there lives are as perfect as they appear, but I love seeing the best of what women do whether they are getting sponsored or have an entire staff helping them. For me it's more of a way to pick and choose things that I enjoy from other people's ideas, not a feeling that I have to do it all and be just like them.